I must be computer illiterate or something because I'm having trouble reading comments that anyone leaves me. So if you left me a comment and I haven't replied, it's not because I'm ignoring your or that  don't appreciate it, I just can't read it or get to it as of yet. Sorry about that, but thank you anyways.

I got dressed this morning and my pants didn't fit. That's not very fun, not for me. If I were a more rational, logical person I could take this all with a grain of salt. I'm too stubborn to look for something that does fit, and as unhealthy as it may be I've just been walking around with my shirt pulled over the waistband, the pants are unbuttoned and unzipped. It's my hips, my hips are too wide for them now.

I always had this ideal image of myself in my head as "too small". I liked the idea of being too small to have children. Too small to get a period. Too small to grow up. Too small to have to worry about things because I was "sick" so I needed to be taken care of. I'm a "normal" person in a normal size and I like to think of myself as pretty independent and self sufficient now.
I think the too big for my jeans, again, has gotten to me though.

I had a dream last night that I was going to a carnival. There were these two twins that were doing a magic show there with face paint on, and they were supposed to be really popular and have a huge following. When I left the carnival to go home they followed me around a corner and were harassing me and making threats at me. Their big deal was that for some reason they thought they had one up on me just because I couldn't tell who was who of them and they kept bringing that up as if it mattered. I eventually shook them off. When I got home there were a bunch of hamsters and guinea pigs and rodents in my room and I couldn't find enough cages to put them in, but I was worried if I didn't get them all their own cages soon they would attack and kill each other. I was afraid they might also hurt Taco Beef and her baby Queso so I was freaking out. But then suddenly my mom came in, while I was running around picking up rodents, and said, "Amy, you don't really have all these pets in your room, it's just a dream." And they all disappeared and it was just Taco Beef and Queso in their cage like normal. And then I woke up all stressed out and sitting up. It was really strange.