I'm going to be heading off to the gigantic nerdfest that is mechacon. I've been there for every one since it began about three years ago, and even though I'm not as into it anymore I'm mainly going to see my friends from maca who I don't get to see very much at all anymore.

There's an entry in this very blog about a year and a day ago from last mechacon. I remember because my dad was visiting here and I didn't eat anything all day at all except for an apple around midnight that he made me eat.

I've already had something to eat today, so I guess history will not be repeating itself. I feel happy and sad about that at the same time. Last year around this time I didn't have a lot of drama with friends or love life stuff going on, and I was thinking last night about how much easier last year was with problems for me than this year is because when I think back to last year I can't really put my finger on any real problems that I had.

But now I remember. I know why it seems like nothing was happening then or that I didn't have people who I had drama with back then or anything. It's because then I was so deep into my eating disorder I didn't care about anything. I didn't have anyone to have drama with because I didn't care about anything enough to have drama.

So this year I'm healthier, I care about a lot of things, and I have a lot of stuff going on in the personal life department with people.

Which year is worse?
I think they're both just different.