I think I can now safe to say that I'm most definitely not improving. I don't think that deep down I want to get better. I don't think it's even hitting home with me that what I'm doing is wrong. I don't think I really have a problem.

I don't really know what my problem is but the restricting is getting worse. Now it's not restricting that's a problem...it's eating that is.
I'm having a tough time keeping things down or sitting down and eating a bite. Or sleeping, definitely sleeping has been the most difficult thing. I feel like there are always more things to be done. If I wasn't so tired....this numb exhaustion. This buzz in my head.

I'm hoping someone will grab me and shake me and make me get better. But I have to want to and I'm not sure if I do.